I kinda like this mail the more reason I am publishing it
first before the one I received last night. It shouldn’t be about us advising
you all the time, it’s cool if you also share your mistakes with us sometimes, so
we can also learn.
Dear Ladun,
I have one or two things to say about married women who keep
friends. I have been married for three years. I am the kind of lady that keeps
a lot of friends and usually love them around me because my husband is not
always around.
My husband often frowned at it when he calls and knows they
are around. But I always enjoy their company so I usually ignore him.
I was naïve at first and told my friends what my hubby
thought of them and they often treated him with disdain. I didn’t like it, but I
let it go.
It didn’t take long before I was gradually introduced into
clubbing, hanging out with young guys and completely forgot I was married. Two
of these ladies were also married. I was made to perceive marriage as a bondage
and a manipulative tool men often employed in controlling women.
This new lifestyle turned me into a completely different
person and I started having extra-marital affairs. I got addicted to having sex
with any other guy out there.
Man husband got to know I have started staying out late
nights and tried talking and fixing things so many times but all to no avail as
I was already enjoying this new life. (I never had one because I was raised
from a very strict home)
He called on my family and friends; after loads of scolding
and bashing, I realized I was stupid and had wronged him all these while
(though it took a long time for me to agree. My unmarried elder sister helped
me better).
After the whole dust had settled, my husband revealed that
my so-called friends had been making series of advances to him, with proof of
my infidelity and all that. One of them in particular was ready to travel to
Abuja to be with me. He showed me her text messages, emails (he particularly
asked her to also communicate through mails because he knows he has the intention
of using it as evidence later on).
This was a real eye-opener to what was never taught in the
class room, rather life taught me humans are not what they seemed. I have
little or no complains because I lived carelessly and threw my home into
disarray (unknowingly).
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